Celebrating Women
When I was exploring a part of Arunachal Pradesh recently, my companion and I needed to stop for lunch and toilet break, on our way down from Mechuka.
We were approaching a hamlet called Tato, and we remembered having tea at this ubiquitous eatery on our way up, run by a young girl. And so, we decided to have lunch at her place, to give her business.
She was happy when she saw us and began cooking what we ordered. She placed a chair inside the kitchen right next to the fire, repeating, “Its so cold,” and asked me to sit there. She wanted to know what we did in Mechuka, if we saw snow and shared how she had seen snow at Mechuka on her maiden trip too.
We could see that life was hard. She was only 22, but had two children; her older one is 5 years old.
She married at 14, and it seemed to be a love match that wasn’t approved by her parents. She hadn’t studied beyond 8th grade. Now she ran this restaurant in an effort to make ends meet as her husband, as young as her, drove private vehicles.
It broke our hearts. Because we kept thinking of what life ‘could have been’ for her, if only she’d made better choices.
But Lucy smiled a lot. And laughed a lot too.
When we celebrate International Women’s Day, for some reason, we tend to focus on successful women, city dwellers, career women, who have broken the bias, broken barriers, shattered glass ceilings, won the race to get where they are.
But on my travels, I have come across strong women who are not your archetype career women - they don’t have the opportunities that we have, they may not even have completed their education, but they are strong and live their lives with dignity - whether its Lucy, Bijuni or the Mitanin from Bastar; raising children, lending a helping hand to their communities or simply working hard to create a better life for their families.
As for Lucy, I support this young girl because throughout our interaction, she never made it sound like she was unhappy, or lamented her hard life. She found ways to improve her life by starting the restaurant and by facing the challenges that resulted from her choices.
These women may not know what International Women’s Day is about and they are probably not included in the celebrations because their economic contribution is negligible.
But, they are heroes too.
And I will celebrate them today.
